D'Arcy's Therapeutic Philosophy

I believe we are here to learn and to grow. Sometimes life-learning is easy and joyful and sometimes it is difficult and painful. Through it all, when we are in tune with the essential elements of life, our journey takes on a flow, a dynamic rhythm, and we experience the meaning and fulfillment for which we have been longing.

We humans are complex creatures, and yet there are straightforward principles that lead us to greater and greater wholeness. We are mind, body, emotion, and spirit. Not one more or less than another. All aspects of our being must be tended in order for us to be well, to be whole. We are also our relationships, for that is the fruit of our way of being in the world. Who we are on the inside is reflected in our life, our work, and in the way we love.

Good relationships are about understanding our self and the other person. Deep understanding takes skill and patience, and the rewards are enormous. Acceptance, respect, intimacy, compassion, love – all are intertwined with understanding, both 'head understanding' and 'heart understanding'. Only by stretching our head and heart can we build the bridges that bring peace, love, and fulfillment.

Power is in our choices. Certain choices lead us (and our relationships) toward more lasting peace and joy, while other choices lead us (and our relationships) toward enduring more hurt and despair. Rather than arguing who's "right", let's use our noggin and really explore with an open heart. It's never about what it's about. Let's consider the unmet need reflected in our partner's cry or the urge of that voice inside that nags. There is always wisdom there; a little under the surface. New Aha's! arise and great new choices emerge from our willingness to sit in the discomfort of not knowing for a time.

A FEW THOUGHTS:

If you had known better, you would have done better.

• Accept. That's just the way it was. It doesn't help to beat up on yourself; it makes things harder.

You are the only person who will always, always be there for you.

• Parent. Being healthy and whole means being your own best friend, your own (good) parent. Protect. Nurture. Encourage.

If you don't like where you are, do something about it.

• Change. The gift of being human is the ability to choose. Talk. Read. Stew. Get help. Whatever. Just start where you are.

Doing what is best for you includes your relationships.

• Love. We are social beings. You will not be happy all alone -- even if you are "right".

Life is a mystery.

• Enjoy. Growing and learning with curiosity, humility and compassion seems to help tremendously. Please join in.